Peace

 Rory on an early Santa watch?

Peace to all.

=^..^=

Wish List ‘07

Each year, Mom and Tim both ask if there is anything in particular I would like for Christmas.  For Tim at least, I try to come up with a couple of things.  Left to their own devices, Tim and Jackie can come up with some strange stuff.  Like, have we met?  When I say “strange,” I am being kind.  When I am being less than kind, I say “useless,” “weird,” or “stupid.”

So I usually give Tim a couple of ideas.  This year was difficult, because my wish list was comprised almost entirely of items that I would have to select myself, along with a couple of things that were out of anyone’s price range (including my own).

Last year’s wish list was full of music and movies.  This year, it’s about cooking, sports, and home.

I managed to find a few items for Tim’s list:

Gutter guards.  He knows I want these.  He also knows I want him to install them, after cleaning the gutters which have gone too many years without.  He ain’t looking forward to it, so he may pass.  Dang.

Small cupcake stand and a chocolate melter.  I provided him with the flyer pages for these.  Otherwise, he would have had no clue, and I likely would end up with a muffin pan and a fondue pot.  I specifically noted that I wanted the 13-cupcake stand.  The melter, I’m hoping, will make the chocolate covered pretzel process even quicker and simpler.  If I get a fondue pot, I’m returning it.

I could have listed a Dutch oven, too, but I thought it better to give Tim fewer options.  Another item I have considered in recent years is a marble rolling pin.  I’ve been curious to see whether they really are much better than wooden ones, but hesitant to shell out the $20-$25.  After all, it’s just a rolling pin, right?

Well, I got my marble rolling pin.  Several weeks ago, I dropped off some boxes and bags at the Salvation Army.  When I went into the store to have my list stamped so I can claim the deduction on my tax return, I browsed the two aisles of kitchenware and knick knacks.  And there was the rolling pin, for just $3.00.

I’ve used it twice already — first, on the cutout butter cookies, and second, on the crust for the apple pie I made today.  I’m loving it.  It’s nice and heavy, so no muscles are needed for rolling, and it’s less sticky than wood, so I don’t have to flour it so much (which makes for better cookies and crusts).  Additionally, it certainly would come in handy should I ever need to take down an intruder (though I think I could get a better swing with the aluminum baseball bat).

For the remainder of my wish list, I’m on my own:

Extra album pages for my Hawaii scrapbook album.  Too much room for error to entrust someone else, even semi-knowledgeable Mom.  Also, loopy brads.  (Yeah, that’s a scrapbooking thing.)

USB flash drive.  Ha.  Neither Tim nor Mom would even know that this is something computer related.

Sled tray for my Winterberry Pfaltzgraff.  I have made it clear that I do not want all the extras that Pfaltzgraff puts out for each of its patterns; however, this serving tray is darn cute.  Unfortunately, I have not been able to find it myself, so I would not send someone else on a wild goose chase.

The brown slides I saw for sale for $49.99 in JCPenney last month when I popped in and out, on the hunt for that Winterberry sled tray.  I’ll check in next week, but I am not optimistic that they will have any more in my common shoe size.

The perfect tote bag.  My previous perfect tote bag bit it a few months ago when one of the shoulder straps broke.  Oh, well, it was a good seven-year run.  I have yet to find a perfect replacement — perfect in size, shape, color, material, and strap width and length.  How can someone else find my ideal tote if I can’t?

Remote car starter and thermostat timers.  I’m not totally certain if I really want these items.  I’d like to believe I can handle a few minutes of cold, that I am neither princess nor hothouse flower.

Ski pants (and, for that matter, a ski parka).  Okay, Mom probably could handle this one (if I directed her to the right store(s)), but I’d rather do my own shopping for these.

New boots for my figure skates.  I have custom skates.  ‘Nuff said.

That’s not so bad, is it?  I mean, it’s not all diamonds and furs.  I should be able to find some of those items in the months ahead, and, with the exception of the skate boots, none are terribly expensive.

For now, I’ll be happy if Tim gets the gutter guards.  And installs them in the spring.

=^..^=

Office Tidings

Loaded down this morning with a big tray of cookies and goodies and a bag of gifts for coworkers in addition to the usual jumbo tote bag o’ stuff (shoes, pocketbook, etc.), I didn’t bother to pack a lunch.  So how perfect was it that Annie, who doesn’t bake but is an awesome cook, brought in a huge crock pot of chili for everyone?!  I really didn’t feel like going out to get lunch anyway.  Perfect gift.  Thanks, Annie.

Also, some of the rebels here are wearing jeans today, always a no-no in our business casual environment.  I am proud to say it was an underground movement initiated a couple of days ago by me.  Just my way of bringing tidings of comfort and joy to the office.  Or, comfort and cookies.

=^..^=

P.S.  Patrick just bestowed me with a huge, awesome gift basket — Godiva biscotti and chocolates, orange cocoa (mmmm, I love chocolate and orange!), pear tea, a variety of cookies and crackers, smoked mozzarella, camembert (yum), and merlot olives.  The basket itself is lovely, too.  Thank you, Patrick.

Glitter Kitty

Following yesterday’s rantfest, it is now time for a little holiday cheer.

While standing at the counter last night, making the last batch of cookies,* I noticed Rory get up from his spot under the Christmas tree and stroll over to the cat bowls.  The light caught him just right, and there was a tiny glint of green on his cheek.

Yes, you know it’s Christmastime when the cat is walking around with glitter stuck on him.

  

* This year’s cookies include peanut butter (with M&Ms instead of kisses for easier storage), Russian teacakes (a/k/a butterballs), cut-out butter cookies (DON’T call them sugar cookies), oatmeal florentines, chocolate snowballs, and cream cheese and walnut rounds.  Tomorrow, it’s the candy:  chocolate dipped pretzels, peanut butter fudge, peanut brittle (all in my Recipes link!), and the chocolate barks (dark with almonds, milk with cashews, and dark with coconut).

And this formerly pre-diabetic girl who quickly got her blood sugar ranges back to normal will exercise extreme caution (and amazing willpower) and have but a mere taste of each, in the name of Quality Control.

=^..^=

The Pain in the Ass Snowstorm That Should Not Have Been

(a follow-up to my previous Snowbabies entry) 

Thursday’s snowstorm wasn’t a bad storm, not for this area.  What was incredulously atrocious, however, was the TRAFFIC.

My 40-minute commute took nearly 2½ hours.  I was one of the lucky ones.  Many people were stuck in traffic for up to 8 hours, just trying to travel a distance of 15 to 20 miles or so.

Our office closed at 1:30.  I glanced out the window and saw traffic congestion in all directions, the streets still unplowed.  It looked like many businesses were closing down, all at roughly the same time.  I decided to wait and hang out for a while, with the hope that the traffic would eventually clear somewhat.  By 3:30 the scene looked much the same, but I decided to leave anyway, before it got dark.

I walked down the street to my car.  It was still snowing, and I had forgotten my hat at home (left it right on the counter!), but it wasn’t a wet snow, so it wasn’t bad.  I retrieved my Snow Rake from the car and quickly cleaned the car.  I used the Snow Rake to push some of the accumulated snow away from the tires, too.

Aside:  I love my Snow Rake.  It has to be one of the Top 3 Things I Own.  I’ve never seen them in stores, but if you live in snow country, I recommend you find one.  Perhaps at an auto supply store?  Here’s what it looks like:

   

A big block of stiff foam rubber mounted on a 4-foot wood handle.  Pushes the heaviest of snow off your car quickly and easily, with nary a scratch.  Puts those weenie snowbrushes to shame.  My Snow Rake came from my Uncle Bill, who is spending a lot of his retirement helping and hanging out at his friend’s car lot.  Someone came to the lot selling them.  Who says door-to-door salesmen are a thing of the past?

Get a Snow Rake if you can.

End Aside.

I entered traffic approximately 1/8 mile down the street from the office.  It was a parking lot.  Traffic inched along.  Forty minutes later, when I was in front of the office (yes, that’s 1/8 mile in 40 minutes), I noticed a car in the adjacent lane with its hazard lights on.  I don’t know how long she had been there, but eventually some guys from our parking garage pushed her car onto the sidewalk, out of traffic.  She had been stuck in traffic so long that she ran out of gas.  I question how many able-bodied men just inched their cars around hers rather than get out and help her out of traffic.  I hate that ignorant shit.  It wasn’t as if traffic were moving.  No one would have “lost” time by coming to her aid.  AND it would have improved the situation behind her, where two already jammed traffic lanes were forced to merge into one.

The first traffic light wasn’t bad.  The second one, just ahead, was an absolute nightmare.  It’s a much larger, busier intersection.  I had the added challenge of needing to turn left.  I could see gridlock.  More ignorant shit.  Why – why, why, why – if traffic is not moving through an intersection, does one proceed into the intersection when the light is yellow?  You know you can’t make it.  And thus, gridlock is born – out of ignorance.

The light turned yellow as I approached it.  I waited.  And watched.  And I could see that basically no one was paying any regard to the lights.  The situation was completely out of control.  The only way to get through the intersection was to move whenever and wherever you could.  If there were two inches of space in front of your car, regardless of the direction, you had to take it, or someone else would.  I had to go slightly to the right before eventually heading left.  Once I got to the light, it took six or seven changes of the light before I had completely proceeded through the intersection.  Have you ever heard of such a thing?

Office to highway, one-half mile.  Nearly 90 minutes had passed.

90 MINUTES TO DRIVE JUST UNDER ONE-HALF MILE.

I then headed through the sloppy mess to the highway.  Hopefully, the highway would be a littler clearer.  Or perhaps sanded.

Nope.

The negative:  The highway had not been plowed or sanded at all.  Four lanes had become two or three “lanes” of travel.  You had to drive in the tracks of the vehicle ahead of you or you would get stuck.  Changing “lanes” was a risk.

The positive:  I would later learn that of the four directions headed out of Providence, I lucked out.  My direction was the only one that was not a total traffic jam.

I noticed a non-municipal truck in the lane to my left.  He was driving with his plow down.  I got behind him.  Eventually, he changed lanes and brought his plow up.  The lane to the right of me looked a lot better than what I was in, so I crossed over.  Almost.  I had almost made it across the snow that was piled up between the tire track lanes, when one or both of my back wheels got stuck.  Fortunately, there was not much traffic in my direction.  Cars were still able to travel on either side of me, so I wasn’t creating a tie-up.  I didn’t want to do the forward-reverse thing.  I think that only makes the ruts deeper.  With no immediately approaching traffic, I FLOORED it while simultaneously jerking the steering wheel hard to the right and hard to the left.  On the second jerk to the right, I got out.  Yea!  Go punchbuggy!  I was afraid the car was going to stall out after flooring the accelerator as I did, but she just gave one little sputter and continued on her merry way.  Good car, good baby.  She didn’t want to be stuck any more than I did.

I drove in third, sometimes second, gear the entire time on the highway.  The traffic in my direction was light and slow but steady.  I prayed that it wouldn’t come to a standstill at any point, because I wasn’t sure if I could get going again after stopping.

Where were the plows?!

I saw one plow on the opposite side of the highway.  Traffic in that direction was completely tied up for the whole distance I was on it.  The one plow was preceded by a state trooper announcing for traffic to merge right so the plow could get by.  What a joke.  How the hell do you merge when the highway is a parking lot?

In my direction, I saw no plows, though they certainly would have been able to get through.  What I did see, though, was plenty of abandoned cars.

Visibility was becoming bad, not because of the weather, but because ice was accumulating under my wipers.  But I couldn’t pull over on the highway, because I would have gotten stuck in the unplowed, untraveled upon snow.

When I exited the highway, the streets in Citytown, while still messy, were significantly better than those in Providence.  I easily made my way home, arriving at 5:50.  I could tell that even my little street, with but ten houses that leads to nothing but the cove, had been plowed, albeit much earlier than my arrival.  I pulled up in front of the house, went in to get my hat, shoveled the driveway, and pulled in.

Inside, I turned on the news and learned that the overall traffic situation was much worse than what I had seen.  Yet, the snowfall was nothing out of the ordinary.

So what the hell happened?

Cars stuck in traffic for up to eight hours.  Abandoned cars everywhere, some disabled (that one back near the office wasn’t the only one to run out of gas), some abandoned out of sheer frustration when drivers decided it would be better to walk.  Gridlock throughout all of downtown Providence.  Worst of all, Providence school buses with elementary school students on board were out stuck in traffic until as late as 11:00 p.m.

 The State Department of Transportation planned to send more than 100 sand trucks and 200 private contractors onto the roads to clear the snow, but the plows were often blocked by traffic.

Dozens of employers and government agencies allowed workers to leave early, as did about two dozen public school districts.  The resulting exodus snarled traffic across Providence.

“Traffic is at a standstill,” said Providence police Sgt. Paul Zienowicz, who was watching the downtown roadways.  “It’s one big traffic jam.” 

Yup, the Snowbabies fucked it all up.

EARLY SCHOOL AND WORK DISMISSALS ARE A HUGE MISTAKE.  Not that anyone is listening.

Rather than put schoolchildren on a bus for up to 11 hours, wouldn’t it be wiser to keep them at the schools?  At the schools, they would be warm and dry.  They would be fed.  They would have restrooms.  They could be kept occupied.  They could be in contact with their parents.  If I had a child on one of those stuck buses, I would be PISSED.  Like never before.  Seriously, I’d consider a lawsuit.  The City has certain duties, and in this case, the City failed to reasonably carry out its duties.  Yeah, I’d sue.  The mayor and the superintendent of schools both should be hung for this.

And why has no one mentioned that early school dismissals necessitate early work dismissal?  All of these worthless, finger-pointing politicos who collect fat salaries fail to realize that in some families (like, nearly all), both parents work.  DUH!  Someone needs to be home if the schools and daycare centers close.  You know, like a PARENT, for those families that don’t have housekeepers.  Stupid, narrow-minded rich people.  So, more traffic, even if businesses do not officially close early.  Some people still need to go home.

Unless the children were kept in school.  Unless employers (including all levels of government) were encouraged NOT to close.  If everyone had stayed calm and remained seated, the plows could have done their thing, and the resulting traffic would have been less hazardous.

I don’t totally let the State off the hook, though.  Plows could have been clearing the highway in my direction home, and yet I saw none.

As for the City of Providence, I would rate it a COMPLETE FAILURE.  The school bus situation is completely unacceptable.  Police escorts were sent to the stranded buses only after media coverage brought the situation to light.  There had been no communication among key personnel in the City and School Department.

Additionally, the anarchic gridlock I experienced at College and Memorial was happening at every major downtown intersection, including Dorrance and Washington, right next to City Hall.  Maybe I’m a swinging genius, but it seems to me that a simple solution would have been to send teams of police officers to each of these intersections.  Disable the lights, put a cop at each corner, and have them direct the traffic.  No more gridlock, and a relatively simple fix.

Seriously, it seemed as if all municipal departments were on strike.  There was no authority, no command, no communication.  Why such a complete breakdown over ten inches of snow?

State:  Borderline Failure
Providence:  Complete Failure
Citytown (my residence):  Pass

Tim called me on Sunday.  His drive home on Thursday took about four hours.  He finished his route even earlier than usual, before the snow and traffic kicked in.  However, he still had to return his truck and drive home, which meant traversing through Providence TWICE.  On the way back, his bladder was getting the best of him.  He did as he saw others do – temporarily abandon his car (highway traffic was at a standstill, so what difference would it make?) and head down the embankment to relieve himself.

Friday’s drive to work was much better.  The local streets were in good condition.  The highway was clear.

Until I got to downtown Providence.  What a mess.  It didn’t look much better than it did the night before.  What the fuck?!  All night and this was the best they could do?  (See “Complete Failure” grade, above.)

More snowfall over the weekend.  This one would be a piece of cake – no schools or businesses open.

Yesterday, driving to work, same as Friday.  Citytown was good, highways were clear.  Downtown Providence was a fucking mess.  Cars were getting stuck going up the street adjacent to our building.  It’s an incline, but nothing steep, not like the treacherous College Hill.  The street was covered in deep, soft snow, not ice, meaning it was plowable.  But not plowed.

This is incomprehensible to me.  My town’s streets are okay.  The State finally got its act together and cleared the highways.  But what’s up with Providence?  Is everyone sitting around with their thumbs up their asses?

I would consider writing a letter to the mayor’s office, but I think it would be a pointless exercise.  Let’s just say someone isn’t getting my vote when he runs for Governor.

Seriously, next snowstorm, let’s all consider sitting tight and letting the plows get out first.  Unfortunately, I fear just the opposite will happen.  The Snowbabies will leave even earlier.  Or maybe we’ll all get lucky, and they will just stay home.

By the way, my coworkers who left the office two hours before I did?  Most of them got home around the same time I did.

=^..^=

Snowbabies

INSERT LOUD SCREAM HERE – AAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGHHHH!!!

It’s just snow, people.

I get more and more frustrated each year.  Are my coworkers getting worse, or am I just getting older and crankier?

There’s Linda, who starts sending weather report emails to the entire office THE DAY BEFORE.

There’s Lisa, who sends emails to the entire office informing us that such-and-such firm is closing at 2:00, Blue Cross is closing at noon, her husband’s employer is already closed, and her friend’s boss is letting her go now.  This, after spending all morning phoning/emailing everyone to get the latest.  So childish.  “Suzy Martin gets to go home now, and Billy Jacobs is leaving in a half hour, and …”

There’s Annie, grumbling about how the Boston office gets to close at 1:00.  Duh, they’re an hour north.  It could be an entirely different weather situation there.  Additionally, many commute to that office by train, and that could be a factor in deciding to close early.

There’s Mary the Pest, who, of course, ticks me off like no other.  I actually used to empathize with her.  She takes off at the sight of the first snowflake (assuming she bothers to come in at all if there’s the mere threat of snow).  I empathized because I know she got (sort of) stuck in the ’78 Blizzard.  I understood her “I don’t drive in snow” credo.  HOWEVER, after that time a couple of years ago when she bailed before the snow was even sticking to the ground and mentioned, “Oh, good, now I can do some Christmas shopping,” all sympathy was lost.  What happened to “I don’t drive in the snow”?  Fucking hypocrite.  Call it like it is.  “I don’t drive to work in the snow.”

She even came in one time on a scheduled day off to attend our lame-ass office party IN THE SNOW.  And when she arrived and learned that the party had been rescheduled due to the weather, she was PISSED.  (“Someone should have called me.  I came in for nothing.”  Is that really a smart thing to walk around the office repeating to everyone?)  And I kind of smirked about it.  Damn fool.  So, you drive to malls and parties (and probably restaurants and bars) in the snow, but not to work.  That’s an awful lot of provisos, Pesty.

The first snow is always the worst.  My coworkers become a roving gang of Nervous Nellies, phoning and convening to discuss how bad the driving conditions are.  They phone their friends and relatives in various towns to obtain regional pinpoint weather conditions.  “So-and-so in North Kingstown says it’s whiteout conditions.”  Big freakin’ deal.  You live in Attleboro – total opposite direction.  What the fuck do you care about driving conditions in North Kingstown if you’re not headed in that direction?

I stay out of it, but unfortunately it is difficult to ignore.  So I just silently seethe.

“Karma, aren’t you leaving soon?” from frantic Linda, who gets a ride from her boyfriend in his gigantic all-wheel drive truck.  (I drive a punchbuggy.)

“No, the snow doesn’t bother me – not as much as these Nervous Nellies do.”  I couldn’t help myself.  I doubt she got it, anyway.

It’s just snow, people.

It’s not as if my coworkers all just got their licenses last year.  They are over 30 years old.  Most are over 40.  It’s not as if they all just relocated from Florida or Mexico or the equator.  They’ve lived in this area all their lives.  They should know how to drive in snow by now.

I would also like to point out that ditching work and hitting the roads at the beginning of a snowstorm isn’t necessarily the smartest approach.  The roads have not yet been sanded, and you will be driving with all the other white-knuckled, Nervous Nellie drivers who are too quick to hit the brakes; look only straight ahead, never to the sides, in utter fear; and most certainly would not know how to drive out of a skid.

And now, after typing all this, most of the Nellies have left.  Assuming the rest will trickle out throughout the afternoon, I will do likewise.  It will be nice to drive home before it gets dark.  And the roads will be sanded by then.  I heart my little front-wheel drive.

=^..^=